I wrote this in 2010, shortly after my mom passed away. Today, on the two year anniversary of her death, the message is just as important.
It’s been an emotional couple of weeks since my mom passed on June 27. My family flew to Philadelphia for the funeral and my father asked me to handle all of the arrangements.
While it was a daunting job to make the travel plans, the funeral arrangements and all the other decisions that accompany a death, my mother left me with such specific instructions that it was relatively painless. Which is why I encourage everyone to start talking about wishes and plans while you still can.
We are encouraged to talk about sex with our kids, to educate them, to take the mystery out of it, to prepare them so that when they are faced with a choice, they can make sound and educated decisions.
Years ago it was taboo to talk about sex. But we see how important it is.
So why is talking about death and funerals, which is just as important, still a taboo subject?
Because it’s uncomfortable. Because it makes us face our own mortality. Because talking about death pushes us sharply into those inevitable feelings of loss, heartbreak and despair.
But, we’re going to feel those things anyway, so why not be as prepared as possible.
Imagine yourself standing at the edge of the ocean, the waves are breaking at your toes and the water is cold. Painfully cold. If you charge right into the waves, the cold is going to be so terribly shocking to your system.
But if you slowly move into the water a few steps at a time, you get a little more used to it. First the water is up to your calves, then to your thighs, and you are gently adjusting to the temperature and all of the sensations. When the big wave breaks and splashes your chest, your shoulders, and then takes you under, it’s not quite as shocking as if you had just plunged in.
Talking about death can be like this too.
My mother and I talked many times about her wishes for her funeral. The first time, eight years ago, was very uncomfortable for me and I remember sitting there, just listening and crying. She said she was sorry to make me sad, but she needed to discuss these things. And I knew that, even though it hurt my heart deeply, it was an important thing to talk about.
We returned to the conversation several times in the last few years, clarifying the details, discussing different options, even laughing about what clothes she wanted to be buried in.
The taboo of the subject was gone and, in so many ways, our talks helped prepare me for her death.
And she wrote everything down so that I wouldn’t have to rely on my memory, so that her wishes were clearly stated, just in case anyone wanted to choose something different.
When it came time for me to actually make the calls, make the choices, make the arrangements, I knew which funeral home to call, what kind of casket to pick, who she wanted to officiate at the services. And I loved reading her handwritten instructions, knowing that I was lovingly and dutifully carrying out all of her wishes.
And that gave me so much comfort and strength.
Making the final arrangements for a loved one can be especially painful if, in the midst of our loss, we have to make guesses and emotional choices. Not knowing our loved one’s wishes opens us to opportunities for doubt, regret, even guilt.
But if you start talking about these things NOW while you still can, you are actually giving your loved ones a great gift.
You get to be real and honest. You get to comfort them while you are still here. And you are giving them the gift of knowing that they are doing everything you wanted.
So open up the dialogue. Begin the conversation. Empower your loved ones with what they will need when that time comes.
Ruth,
Thanks so much for writing this. I recently taught a class for people with chronic illnesses and we had a section on advanced planning. We talked a lot about obstacles to planning. An 80+-year-old man said he just didn’t want to think about it. What people don’t realize is that if it’s done…it’s an enormous weight off the family. And you’re so right, it does allow a dialogue to start. And I believe I just found the answer to the question I asked you a couple of weeks ago (so double thanks!)
Ruth,
I applaud you for writing this. This is such an important topic. Working with older adults, and many indiviiduals with Alzheimer’s or other dementias, I have seen first hand what can happen when people are not prepared. Things can, however, change so quickly for any of us. Beginning to declutter our home this summer has been a challenge but after reading of the heartfelt expereince you shared with your mother, I know it is necessary. This decluttering is just the beginning of the process.
You related your experience in such a beautiful way, I was right there crying with you. Your mother was a very wise woman, and you a loving, dutiful daughter. How fortunate for both of you to share and complete this final stage of life together.
Ruth, the timing of my reading this is perfect. Thank you so much for sharing who you are – it MAKES A DIFFERENCE!
My mother is making arrangements now. My father passed away last year and because they were prepared, everything went perfect for my mom. Currently, she is making adjustments to her own trust and will and we are making sure that her wishes are in order so that they can be carried out easily and the remaining children do not have to go through hassles to take care of the loose ends when she passes. It has been a weight off of her shoulders, knowing that things are in order and are laid out in a comprehensive manner. It is uncomfortable for her and me because it is a sad and harsh reality, but has also been a new bonding experience, leaving her knowing that she will be honored long after she has left this world. Thank you for writing about this, you have written about this before and that is what prompted me to have this discussion with my mom and the results are better than I expected, so far.
Tracy, bless you and your mom and siblings and surround yourselves with the love.
Ruth, so beautifully spoken and so right on! Thank you for your sensitivity and attention to this topic. I so agree. Your mom was pretty exceptional to be able to light heartedly address these issues years ahead of time.
And yet… my 89 year old mom (who even has been a hospice volunteer herself for 30 years!) is reluctant to hold these conversations. I think she is still working it all out in her own head and dreads loss of control. I realize that having these talks are definitely for my comfort when she makes her transition. But NOT having them yet seems to be for HER comfort right now while she is alive! And of course that also means the world to me… Your thoughts?
Karen, it’s definitely not easy. Maybe if you started the conversation. sharing what YOU would like for your OWN end of life. Perhaps if you brave the waters she will follow. Or ask her a single specific question, just to dip a toe in. Best to you both!
Ruth thank you for reminding me that I need to do this with my Dad. You detailed everything so clearly! What a tribute to your Mom today.
Kim, we ALL need to do this for ourselves. So be sure and also talk about what YOU want.