We all avoid something.
Going through that stack of mail. Making an appointment with the dentist. Getting on our bikes and riding around the block.
My biggest avoiding is Getting New Glasses. Big capital letters kind of avoiding. Just the thought of it makes me want to run and hide.
I’ve been wearing glasses since I was four and every single time I get fitted, it’s a struggle. My eyes are so sensitive to even the slightest bit of crooked or discomfort that I usually end up in frustrated tears because the glasses are too close, too far, too high, too low, too tight, too loose.
I have tried affirmations – this will be easy, effortless and a good fit.
I have breathed and meditated and visualized a successful fitting.
But so far, it hasn’t worked.
And so I’ve avoided Getting New Glasses for three and a half years and I really can’t put it off much longer. My neck and shoulders are sore from using my bifocals to see the computer screen, the scratches on my lenses make distance reading a challenge and I can no longer read the tiny print.
But before I can even begin the process, I have to know the reason I am doing this uncomfortable, challenging thing.
I remember what it’s like when I finally have a new prescription and a good fit – how crisp and clear and beautiful everything looks. And I know I am very ready to see my world like this.
And when I remember that life is lived here, in this small present moment, I remember to breathe. And in that space I realize that Getting New Glasses is no longer this One Big Thing that I have to avoid.
It is really a series of small, present moment actions. Baby steps. And slowly, willingly, I am able to break it down into small, do-able action steps:
getting my eyes checked for a new prescription
finding frames that I love
getting measured
getting fitted
getting the fit tweaked and fine tuned
as many times as that takes
When I break it down into small, manageable, do-able actions, I bring myself closer to the outcome I want, which is SEEING CLEARLY!
And each time I complete one small step, I reward myself, either with a delicious dinner out or today, after my eye exam, a new pair of socks.
And I know that, if I breathe before each task, and breathe between each step, I will have the courage and energy to move forward to the next small step.
And before I know it, I will be seeing clearly again!
So,
What are you avoiding?
What story is associated with this thing? Is it true?
Why are you doing it in the first place?
How might you feel once you are on the other side of it?
What can you do to make it less traumatic, maybe even fun?
Can you break this Big Thing into small, do-able action steps?
How will you reward yourself for each step you take?
What is the first small action you can take to begin?
I’d love to hear how you use these questions to get it done! Please share by clicking on the Comments below.
OK!!! You know me!!!! I’ve been avoiding the same project for 20 years. 20 years!!!! Recently
I was reading some things I wrote when I took a women’s writing class long ago and I’m writing the same things today. I broke it down into smaller pieces and gave myself a certain time to accomplish each goal. I accomplished the first part and was so excited. That’s the last I’ve worked on it. I’ve built a new 7-drawer filing cabinet. Now I have about 7 in my room.
As soon as I finish this note, I will try to utilize my space more efficiently.
I think the big thing for me to do is to answer the question: Why am I doing this in the first place? I can do this!!!!!!!!
Your glasses story made me smile. I can see you finding a pair of glasses that you love. I’m getting my eyes examined next week. I think I’ll find a pair of glasses I love.
Vicki, I’m thrilled that my story made you smile. And reminded you about your own BIG THING. Yes! We have to know the WHY or what’s the point for doing it in the first place!